RelationshipsAndFacades

Less than three weeks left.

What better way to spend it then at a friend's house? It's been a long time since I have stayed two consecutive nights at a friend's place. I find it exciting! Even if the thought of leaving indefinitely leaves me with a somewhat hollow feeling inside. People ask me if I am sad that we are moving or something along those lines. Answer? Absolutely no sadness. Just an empty shell of emotion. That is the best way of putting it. I must admit that the entire notion of us uprooting our lives and heading off to an unknown continent is still unbelievable. Alas, I am still a human. I tend to put too much value into tangible evidence instead of the words of a Loved One. Plane tickets are bought. House is 'sold'. Packing is a imminent. All that is left is a few days and an ocean between me and my new home.

Enough of that boring stuff.

I am currently writing this post at a new location. You would think that new location would be my new future home, but it is just a Great Friend's abode. Laughing is as common as breathing whenever I spend time with my family away from my family. I might be too candid in saying this, but I feel like a part of their family whenever I am with them. No facade, no pretending. Just ol' Missingnomer as himself. I don't know if that is a good thing or bad thing though.... It would be kind of awkward if I was actually shunned for my apparent lack of decency. Though acting like someone I am not reminds me of one of the more detestable sides of human character. Why on earth are we expected to act "kind and gracious" to everyone we meet? Acting like someone you aren't isn't that great. In fact, after a while I would imagine people would start to loathe the very idea of spending time with people at all.

Even though I say that, it doesn't stop me from acting unlike myself around new acquaintances. It must be some sort of defense mechanism. To hide behind a mask of "proper etiquette" means to lie to the very person you are conversing with. That is a harsh way to put it, but it is nonetheless true. At least I find that in myself. Of course, anomalies that defy this rule are sure to exist. With every rule and law there are always exceptions, whether it be human or otherwise. But for me? I am just a dude that acts the way he wants to act. Whether people like it or not is up to them. We are told to love others, not like them.

I still find it comical. Whenever my parents or siblings talk about other people with the family, they always bring up valid points concerning a particular person's character, oddities, and down right crass nature. Most people would classify that as gossiping and you would probably be accurate in saying so. But I couldn't find myself discrediting any of the things my family brought to light. Though even if a person does an absurd trespass and deeply hurts or bothers someone, we simply shrug it off and never confront them about the matter. Why? Most families and friends should be able to come together and discuss differences. If you can't even do that with your family how in the world are you going to be able to do it with someone who isn't?

"Breaking the ice" is a common term used to imply the act of breaking down the walls that we humans tend to create when we meet new people. Whenever we meet someone we find ourselves using this "Fake Self" as a way to seem presentable to other people. By this act of playing the kind and courteous person we try to make a positive first impression. But is a first impression of someone acting unlike themselves truly a GOOD first impression? Hardly. In some cases I am sure that when two people meet and do that to each other they instantly bottle-neck their relationship from progressing any further than "quaint acquaintances".

When I first met the offspring of this owner's abode I am sure we both put on our facades of "nice people" and acted accordingly. A handshake, a smile, introducing ourselves and others, and then commenced with small talk which amounted to absolutely zero value. That is way it is. That is the way it should be, right?

Thankfully time continued and we spent more time together. It seems that the more people commune the more they get to know about each other. Obviously, you can only make a good friend if you eventually take off that facade and genuinely discuss things that you love and things that concern you and others. After that it is just a matter of time before you become close and form a relationship. I admit, there are a million factors that must be addressed before a friendship can truly blossom, but the point is that friendships can only result in time spent with each other AND acting like yourself. The thing is that even if you may have revealed your true self to the other person that may or may not be true for the other party. They might have kept the friendship at arms length. But that is when the most important thing in a relationship comes into being. Trust.

So there. That is my crude attempt at a breakdown for a friendship. I am so glad for mine. Making a friend in life is one of the best things you can do. We all need people to laugh and talk with. But it is even sweeter for fellow believers. Not only will the friendship sharpen each other's faith, but it will also last forever. At least, I hope it will. It could. It should. It will. It is.

DISCLAIMER: If you believe any of this, then I am not sorry....because it is just too obvious that this is just plain, ignorant, and foolish rambling. Thanks for putting up with me Dear Readers. On to the next topic!